Path to Purple

TNTT. Art. Prayer.

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See you in the Eucharist

This past Sunday, 5/17/2020, Liên Đoàn Thánh Gia hosted the VEYM online Mass. During his homily, Fr. Hai Ho, OFM Cap. reminded us all that we are all connected through an invisible string from our hearts to the Eucharist. I was reminded of another Huynh Trưởng’s story I heard years ago about how she was no longer going to be able to see her friend again, but that friend said, “I will see you in the Eucharist.”

Later that day, I tuned into Đoàn Tôma Thiện‘s Eucharistic Adoration online. As I looked at the monstrance, I remembered the statement, “I will see you in the Eucharist.” At that moment, I realized this is the reason why I still feel connected to you and that you do love me.

Because despite the distance that separates us and time we have not spoken to each other, I see you in the Eucharist.

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I see you in my dreams

The night before, I must have been thinking about you more than usual because I had a dream about you that night.

In the dream, your flawed self and weakness was revealed as you stood, hurt, in your office as someone yelled at you and stormed out. I peeked in and asked if you were alright. Knowing that I wanted to talk to you, you told me to have a seat and began to clean up the table. As you tried to put things away, I saw a tear roll down your cheek and you quickly wiped it away.

My heart ached to embrace you. To hold your pain in my heart. To let you know that you were not alone.

To love you as how you have loved me.

Flawed. Imperfect. Broken.

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a prayer from my heart

Livestream Eucharistic Adoration by Đoàn Tôma Thiện (San Jose, CA)

Jesus.

My soul longs for You.

In these days when I feel separated from You,

let it remind me of the heartbreak

You felt in longing for me to return home to You.

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Not doing well

Holy Thursday Trilingual Mass (Livestream) at Most Holy Trinity Parish

4 weeks since Shelter-In-Place.

I have stopped praying and have forgotten what it means to have a spiritual life.

I am not doing well.

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Đoàn Lent Retreat Logo & Flyer 2020

The Trưởng Bàn of Bàn Ghi Danh asked me to help out by designing the Lent Retreat Logo & Flyer for our Đoàn’s Lent Retreat this year. (Unfortunately, it was canceled about 4 days before due to COVID-19.) She showed me an image of our theme that our Ban Thường Vụ at the monthly Hội Đồng Huynh Trưởng meeting. Our Lent theme this year was “J.O.Y.: Jesus. Others. Yourself.” The image they showed was a bright and happy picture of the word “Joy.” 

BTV’s Inspiration

However, she also sent me an example of how she would like the flyer to be like:

Trưởng Bàn of Bàn Ghi Danh’s Inspiration

I quickly used Canva to design two options for flyers based off the two examples she sent me. 

My first flyer design was based off the image that Ban Thường Vụ showed at the monthly Hội Đồng Huynh Trưởng meeting. My initial thought was that it reminded me of a splash of water colors, which is why there is a splash of water colors in the middle. I decided that the background would be black not only because it would make the text easier to read, but also because the black would represent the darkness. “You brought color back into my life” is a quote that I kept thinking of as I was designing the flyer. The color splashes into and overcomes the darkness of the soul. I think this is how the Holy Spirit enters us sometimes.

My first flyer design

The second flyer design was based off the example that she liked. However, I did not keep the purple theme. Instead, I went with a less saturated colored theme to represent Lent. The Trưởng Bàn really wanted to keep the wreath and I was able to find a free and simple wreath design. I actually really liked this design because of its simplicity. 

My second flyer design

In the end, Ban Chấp Hành liked the first flyer design and I was satisfied with their decision because the flyer was unique and I was able to fit in the TNTT logo on it.  

The flyer was used to promote our Lent Retreat on Facebook.

I also had the opportunity to design the logo. The Đoàn Trưởng did not give any clear instructions on how he would like the logo. Originally, there were no green leaves around the crown of thorns, but the Đoàn Trưởng asked to add it because he wanted it to look like this book cover:

The Đoàn Trưởng’s Inspiration

His reasoning is that through Christ’s death and resurrection, we are given new life, which is represented by the green leaves. I complied to his requested changes, but he was disappointed by the cartoony leaves. However, both the Trưởng Bàn of Bàn Ghi Danh and I agreed to keep to this final design:

Final Logo Design

The logo was used on the name tags. Here is a picture of the Trưởng Bàn of Bàn Ghi Danh’s hard work of putting the name tags together. The colors represented the Ngành that the kids are in.

Final Name Tags

I honestly put in a lot more work into the logo than I thought I would have to and it is very disappointing that our Lent Retreat got canceled, but I was happy to see my logo being put into use even if it was just for display. Trưởng Bàn of Bàn Ghi Danh was very creative and the logo looks good with it. Maybe we can use it for next year’s retreat.

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Go Forth and Set the World on Fire

In 2012, Phong Trào Thiếu Nhi Thánh Thể Việt Nam tại Hoa Kỳ hosted the (currently) only Đại Hội Hiệp Sĩ Toàn Quốc and since then, have not hosted any under-18 conventions. Below is the audio of the original version of the original theme song of Đại Hội Hiệp Sĩ Toàn Quốc.

As I listen to this song, I was taken back to 2012 in Carlinville, IL. I felt the same awe and love in TNTT and in God as I felt back then.

The original version is more upbeat and carries an excitement that cannot be explained by anybody else other than the Hiệp Sĩ that attended the convention. There was indeed so much excitement. Besides it being the first time I stepped on an airplane and a different state besides California, it was also the first time I met people in TNTT from other states. It was the first time I saw how big TNTT really was. It was the first time I saw what TNTT was all about. However, it was during this time that I was truly unsure of my path in TNTT and my Catholic faith. But Đại Hội Hiệp Sĩ Toàn Quốc relit a fire within me that has been dimed for too long and did not know it could be relit. This song reminded me of my love for TNTT.

In the original version, there are two voices. One voice singing the English part and another voice singing the Vietnamese part. The latter voice is my friend. Below is a video of him playing a new version of the original theme song of Đại Hội Hiệp Sĩ Toàn Quốc. 

Today, the new version reminds me of my love for TNTT. I am more confident and sure of my path in TNTT and my faith. In this version, I feel more stable and at peace. But, I also feel the heartache that accompanies my desire to serve God. Maybe it is God’s plan that this song reflects my heart.

Thank you to my friend for taking on my song request and playing this old song that he created with his friend.

Thank you. This song means so much to me.

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Pray for each other

 

I was feeling defeated, frustrated, and disappointed. I expressed how I felt and my Confessor listened.

Suddenly, my Confessor said, “I’ll pray for you. You don’t have to pray for that anymore.”

As soon as I heard him say that, I felt this invisible burden that I did not know existed lift off my shoulders. I couldn’t believe he was willing to pray for me for something I felt would be considered silly by others, but he was adamant about it.

“Do you trust me to pray for you?” my Confessor asked.

“Yeah, I do,” I answered.

“Okay, but you have to pray for me, too,” he said.

I laughed and said, “I already do pray for you.”

We continued to talk and he ended with, “Now don’t worry about that anymore. Just go and be holy!”